The Meaning of Life (MOL) ~ World’s Greatest Political Satire! is initiating a new public service for conservative tweeters who are deeply offended by the inane, vulgar and disgusting tweets of liberal twits directed at conservatives. The appalling nature of these tweets always leaves the conservative tweeter at a loss for words because conservatives have style, panache and class and are not used to getting into the gutter and using the foul language of today’s liberals.
Fortunately, we at MOL are not so constrained (or so sophisticated). The only taste we have is in our mouths, we have been in the gutter so long that curbs look tall to us, and we lack the class, style and civility of other conservatives. Therefore, we are in the perfect position to offer appropriately offensive (and humorous) responses to insolent liberal tweets. (And, we are never at a loss for words, being intimately familiar with every one of the 829,286 words in the English language – although we favor the seven you can’t say on TV.)
When we notice see an offensive tweet directed at upstanding, intelligent and good looking conservative, our Tweet SWAT Team (TST) will formulate and publish a suggested response.
Our publication format is simple. We will display the actual tweets that have been transmitted between the parties and then provide a suggested classless and vengeful response. Of course, the conservative tweeter is not obligated to tweet our recommendation, but if they do, they can blame the entire kerfuffle on us at MOL and dodge all liability. Here we go . . .
VOL. I – NO. 1 – March 2020.
REAL TWEET OF IVANKA TRUMP – “Staying home today w/ kids? Plan living room camp out! … A fun activity that also brings family together for a meal (S’mores optional).”
REAL TWEET RESPONSE OF ILHAN OMAR – “Thinking of Families separated forcefully by your father’s policies today.”
MOL SUGGESTED TWEET RESPONSE OF IVANKA TRUMP – “Thinking of an adulterous, partisan, Somali bigamist, who comes from a country where family rape and murder are pandemic, telling me about happy family life. Would you like a S’more?”
Editor’s Note: proper grammar would be “forcefully separated”.
Editor’s Note: factually incorrect, there is no indication that President Trump instituted a policy separating families on the date of this tweet-March 17, 2020.